Tish B'Av 2012

When we look back over the history of this date the 9th of Av...it all begins with a negative report of Israel. I'm not saying we brought on our own destruction of the temple, just saying that certainly our negative speech affects Hashem to the very core. This year someone challanged us to take a 40 day speech diet and only speak positively of Israel for the 40 days leading up to today the 9th of Av. I took up the challenge but I did't quite stay with the program. Our son's trial had gone well. (see previous blog post) Just days after recieving word that the case was again closed, it was reopened again for a third time. This time the army warned, they would make sure to throw the book at him. Today as I fast I am praying for righteousness to be restored in the land, in the military, in the government, in the phone companies, the ministry of transportation, in the mechanic shops, etc. I prayed today that the "holy" land would indeed again be holy.... be set apart from all other nations. I pray that there would be no need to worry about reports of giants in the land. That report wasn't a false report by the way....it isn't about truth...its about perspective. I pray one day there would be no more giants! Maybe this is how Hashem feels when we transgress against the torah....does He feel like I do now?. Like a bride whose groom has totally let her down? I thought I was in covenant with Israel....and that I'd be blessed in the land. But by this case being opened again, I feel so betrayed. Maybe we have to taste this bitter betrayal......swallow this completely unfair pill....because its what we have coming to us as a nation. Sure Tim isn't guilty....he's as righteous as can be.....one of the top soldiers this army could have ever asked for....but isn't that what we are as Israel? The suffering servant? Innocent sheep going to slaughter. It isn't fair that the Olympics wouldn't state Jerusalem as our capitol, it isn't fair that they wouldn't give one minute of silence for our murdered athletes in Munich... it isn't fair that mothers lose night after night of sleep because their sons are in danger as they try to protect and serve their country, their people, their God. It isn't fair that our enemies are given more rights that the victims! but there is no word for "no fair" in hebrew....and hey, that isn't fair either! So to sum up my thoughts on Tish B'Av...I feel that this time of repetative sorrow and grief is irrepairable. It is who we are, and why we are here and is unavoidable. yes speaking positively of Israel is vital...its a mitzvah that does help justify the bad reports from the past and from my own present. HaShem forgive me for my negative reports of the land and help me to speak positive even when life isn't fair. I believe the temple will be rebuilt with the help of our speaking good reports of the land.